The quest for the holy grail...

So I apparently don't get dinner on saturdays, we are on our own, so all I want is some avocado (which they have down here...THANK GOD) and crackers. I wanted cheese, pero bueno, avocado is much more important. So anyways, my señora had to walk the dog, so she said she would join me in my quest to purchase an avocado. We went to 3 different little stores all within a block from the house. Get this...the first one had a RED avocado! RED! Can you BELIEVE that?!!?!?!?! I mean, I have seen it tinted red before, but this was RED, through and through! My señora was equally mystified, but the guy at the store was pretty defensive about his red avocado! He kept saying that there are many different types of avocado and that it was still good (it needed another day, though. Poor guy doesn't have the touch of an avocado connoisseur). Oh, and it has been such a struggle because they call aguacate "Palta," which is such a trip! I always say aguacate by default and everyone looks at me like im a weirdo! They also don't have a good way to say "how cool" and they give me looks when I say "que padre," too! (FYI for those who do not know, que padre is how cool in spanish, but is very regional to Mexico. So I am instantly pegged as a Mexi. Fine by me, but I don't want to stand out so much!) So lame! they need to get on inventing new words, man. This isn't chill. Anyways, so when we finally found a decent selection of avocados, I go and start feeling them to pick one and my señora suggests I let them pick one for me because they would know better. I had to laugh. I mean, please. Besides my mother and estella, no one rivals my avocado picking abilities. I have been taught by the best. The grocery guy could tell, too, because he said he was nervous to pick one for me incase it was bad! I had to agree, though, I would have been "re enojada" (really mad, re is regional for Argentina to mean very) if he picked a bad one. Anyways, I also asked one of the bigger little markets (oxymoron...haha) if they had Maseca to make mexican tortillas, but apparently you can't ask the guy behind the vegetable stand because he has no idea what goes on in the aisle right next to him. Apparently he rents out a spot to sell in the store, so he is pretty independent of the store itself. Weird. They all laughed at me. haha Including the people in line to purchase their vegetables. As if that was such a stupid assumption! My Bad that in the US, if you work in a store, you know what's up in the whole store! haha oh well, I was laughing with them, it was very entertaining! But alas, they did not have maseca. The chinese store supposedly does though...and they think I am the weird one?! Please.